Getting Rid of the Negativity

I have some pretty great friends. Then I also thought I had some pretty great friends. What I mean by that is, I had some people in my life that I thought were really awesome. Turns out, that was not the case. I started to see true colors; I started to see their actions truly spoke louder than their words. I also started to judge these actions. I then came to the realization that judging people’s actions and even talking about them (ahem gossiping) is just absolutely exhausting. I said to a good friend of mine recently that I was tired of trying to read people, tired of trying to see the good in people. I am always trying to see the good in people.

I am not a one strike and you are out type of gal. However, if I always trying to find the good in a situation or a person; chances are there is not much good and maybe that person or situation is not meant to be in my life anymore. Maybe I shouldn't have to work so hard to see the good in people. It should come naturally. Honestly, if it doesn't come naturally, then I am judging you. If I am judging your actions, then I am probably talking about them to someone when I shouldn't be. And with that, I am done. I do not need any more of that in my life. What I need is just the positive. What can I do that is good? And hey, if I notice something truly good about someone, well that is amazing. I don’t have time for the negative actions or guessing or judging.

 I guess most of this comes from this lifestyle, the whole Army friendship thing. Friendships come and they go so quickly. We form a bond and trust so quickly. Some  form because there are those need to be surrounded by people and situations, others just enjoy getting caught up in other people’s business, then some are just lonely. I try to take my time, but moving around a lot gets lonely fast. I have been blessed to make two amazing friends here after a year of living here. You don’t realize what a rock these people become in your life. The friends who I have lost or thought I had though, well that number is higher. You cannot convince me that some of them are good people, no matter how much they smile at you and play the game.

The friends I have, they are my family. They are the ones I call when I have to rush to the ER and need somewhere for children to go. They are the ones I call crying because I miss home. They are the ones I call because I am not quite sure what to do with a sick child’s symptoms. They are the ones I spend my special moments and holidays with. This is my positive. All of that other junk, it is just that, junk. I am officially washing my hands of it. As much as I have stayed away, I am just officially and decidedly done.